If you are lucky enough to NOT be a native of Fresno then you may not get all of these jokes...for those of you that do understand them all...I feel your pain.
25 REASONS WHY YOU KNOW YOU ARE IN FRESNO...
1. You have to explain to Friends from
out of town, what animal a
"Tri-tip" comes from and that it's indigenous to the area.
2. You buy salsa by the gallon.
3. Drivers think a red traffic light is just a suggestion.
4. All of your out-of-state friends start to visit after October,
but clear out before the end of April.
5. Most of the restaurants in town have the first name "El" or
"Los"
6. You think 6 tons of crushed rock makes a beautiful yard.
7. You notice your car overheating before you drive it.
8. You no longer associate bridges (or rivers) with water.
9. You see more irrigation water on the street than in the canals.
10. You know a swamp cooler is not a happy hour drink.
11. You can say 115 degrees without fainting.
12. Vehicles with open windows have the right-of-way.
13. People break out coats when the temperature drops below 70.
14. You discover, in July, it only takes two fingers to drive your car.
15. You think someone driving wearing oven mitts is clever.
16. The pool can be warmer than you are.
17. You can make sun tea instantly.
18. You run your air conditioner in the middle of winter so you can
use your fireplace.
19. People with black cars or upholstery are assumed to be from
out-of-town.
20. Hot air balloons can't go up, because the air outside is hotter
than the air inside.
21. You realize that Valley Fever isn't a disco dance.
22. The water from the cold water tap is the same temperature as the
hot one.
23. It's noon in July, the kids are on summer vacation, and not one
person is moving in the streets.
24. You actually burn your hand opening the car door.
25. You notice the best parking place is determined by shade instead
of distance.