Quote of the day… “You don’t stop a homocidal sociopath by chatting him up.”
I saw this on television today while I was working from home and thought, “wow… just good old homespun wisdom like that can keep me whole. Good thing I have TV to get it to me, otherwise I might try something stupid like that!”
Does anyone with a brain actually think that television’s worth watching any more? Let’s look at what’s on.
Reality TV – ever notice that “reality TV” is the worst of human behavior? I mean, come on! No one is like these people they find for these shows, not even them. It’s all an act! It’s a joke to call it reality… who’s reality is this? I think it’s the network’s reality of selling you a boatload of garbage and convincing you it’s for real while they laugh all the way to the bank.
Special Interest Channels – well, we have a military channel, a health channel, an extreme sports channel (I guess watching skateboarding is almost as good as doing it???), a history channel, a biography channel, and a myriad of other special interest television channels… all filled with the same content over and over and over and over… First, they played Biography on A&E, then when it appeared that it was a little popular, they decided to dedicate a whole stinking television channel to it! Now, I don’t know about you (this is my rant, remember?), but I guess you’d really really really have to care about the biographies they do to even flip to this channel. I mean, come on! How many times to we need to hear about Tom Hanks and his struggle to be taken seriously after Bosom Buddies???
So, add in the all-news, all-the-time channels – We have CNN, CNN Headline News, Fox News Channel, CNBC, MSNBC, ESPN-News… ugh, how many different takes do we need from talking heads on Prince Charles’ wedding, or the death of the Pope??? On top of this, we have a local all-news channel too! Imagine the news-pool they have to draw from in a place like Charlotte NC. TV news organizations are important, I mean after all, look how good they’ve covered the last two presidential elections. Oh, and their stunning and powerful coverage of everything from the OJ Simpson trial to the Kobe Bryant debacle… the term “media circus” keeps popping up in my head and I can’t make it stop. I will actually give kudos here one time… the coverage of Ronald Reagan’s funeral last year was actually pretty good. But that class of journalism is so rare to see, it makes TV news intolerable… I am sticking to newspapers and online publications.
Then we go to the specialty sports channels – Golf, tennis, racing, regionalized sports… why don’t we have a chess channel or a lawn-darts channel too? They’re just about as exciting as some of the others. I guess I should be careful here. People get darned religious about their sports.
Don’t forget about the other strange channels that really don’t fit into anything – channels like Trio and Bravo. How do you describe these channels? Artsy-Fartsy? Froo-Froo? I saw some really bizzare programming on Trio the other night, and apparently they spend a lot of time on the weekends showing programs with a gay slant. Wassup with that? So now, to make sure we don’t offend anyone who likes to have abnormal sex, we’re going to air it on TV. Man, good thing TV’s around to make us all one big happy family. Then they have another show called “Good Clean Porn” where they’ve apparently taken out all the actual pornography out of 70s porn films and left just the “drama”. How nice of them to clean it up for us. Given the original intent, I can’t see the point here… it’s as if the statement is being made that there’s more to these films than just what their original intent was. Yeah, right, whatever… this stuff is really the bottom of the barrel, and thankfully no one in the house has asked about it yet because it’s hard to explain away garbage like that to my kids. They always want to know why anyone would want to watch it.
Finally we have the original 3, (plus FOX) networks – oh how the mighty have fallen. Might as well lump in TNT, USA, TBS, WGN, and all the other superstations and their spin-offs here too, because all they do is regurgitate the crap that was shoved in front of us to begin with 6 months after it originally aired. People rave about network television… the reality shows, sit-coms, and dramas, but I can’t get the attraction. Outside of a sporting event, or special coverage of a news event, every time I watch a sit-com, I walk away thinking “well, there’s 30 minutes of my life I’ll never get back…” Every once in a while, something quality comes out of the networks… like The Simpsons, or, Seinfeld. For the most part, however, this pablum they feed us is little more than a pathetic attempt to keep us hooked long enough to keep their sponsors happy.
And I guess that’s what it all boils down to – people need to figure out that television isn’t there for us. It’s there for the sponsors to sell to us. We’re not the customers, we’re the product. The advertisers are the customers, and the television producers are the wholesalers… selling us to the highest bidder. If you don’t think this is true, open your eyes and take a look around you. When Jennifer Aniston got a gadget, or wore something on “Friends”, you can bet there was a whole segment of society went out to buy it. You didn’t see a product on a show like this unless the product manufacturer paid for it… Don’t believe me? If it’s not true, why do people on sit-coms drink soft-drinks out of a can marked “Cola” instead of a Coke or Pepsi can? Everyone knows it’s gonna be one or the other, right? But the producers aren’t going to give anyone a free ride by letting us see Jennifer Aniston, or Ray Ramano drinking their favorite beverage and turning us onto it.
All of this makes me glad I don’t have to work from home all the time…
– Scott Keoseyan – April 09 2005